So I have very recently gone through a divorce, very recent. The term failed marriage has been hitting a nerve with me. Yes my marriage is over, but it was in no means a failure. Because of my marriage I have two amazing little girls. I have learned so much, and grown so much, during and because of my marriage- that it certainly was a success. I would not be who I am today, or be where I am at, if it wasn’t for my marriage.
Every day we have small decisions to make, small turns to take, and it’s these small turns that add up and determine what life road we take. Of course there are also life’s major decisions- the ones that make us stop, take out our compass and make a direction and destination change. But I think it is more the small things that add up and determine where we are so much more than we realize.
As we travel down this crazy road we call life, at times we take a different turn then those close to us. Many times we can still end up together on the same path or a close parallel path. Unfortunately this was not the case for my ex-husband and I- over time our paths continued to move further and further apart until we were to far away to come back together. It certainly doesn’t mean one is right and one is wrong, simply that we have different paths now. We shared the same path for a long time and I would never give up or change the journey we took together, but I also have to be true to myself. I deserve to live in a happy home, and so do my ex-husband and our children. Each one of us deserves happiness and it is up to each one of us to make our home happy, even if at times it means changing who is in that home with us.
I hear so many people talk about “staying together for the children” and I believe at times you need to separate for the children. I do not want my girls growing up thinking and seeing that this is what a marriage is, that this is how a husband and wife should interact. It is impossible to be the best parent you can be when you are unhappy. Even if everything in your life is great but this one thing, that one thing leaves a residue that coats your life and everything else. Here is to rinsing off that residue and starting on my next path.
This does not have to pertain to just marriage but to all your relationships in life. Whether it be a significant other, friend or family, sometimes we need to wish them well and wave goodbye as we continue on the path that is right for us, the path we are destined to take.
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Off Your Rocker Pottery